I was looking over the essays for tomorrow’s class (Tuesday-Thursday) and the first paragraphs are…not what I would label your best. To help I have posted a sample first paragraph for you to review. I will give anyone who wishes a rewrite on the first paragraph. It’s a few points, but more importantly, the chance to get back to using introductions as a place to write descriptively and purposefully.
SAMPLE INTRODUCTORY PARAGRAPH ESSAY #1
The earliest colonies of North America began as no more than handfuls of idealistic adventurers seeking something an ocean away from the world they knew. Their risk was rewarded with hardship and isolation, with many clinging to live and others clinging to each other and word of God for survival. But it was out of this struggle that a growing colonial society emerged prior to the American Revolution. It was a period of competing interest, conflict, and social changes. The colonies were distinct; and the events that shaped them just as distinct and diverse. Religion became more open and emotional, while more and more slave ships arrived in the harbors. But it was a war for control of the continent that eventually set the colonies on the road to revolution.
Only one person actually asked for help on the first essay. I’m not sure what this means. I hope this goes well. I’m expecting some seasoned writing out of you guys. To quote the teacher from “A Christmas Story,” knowing how good you can be I will be disappointed in the margins if it’s not there. Send me an email over the weekend if you want me to proof anything.
My Best,
Mr. Rickman